Amount of avocado in real guacamole: 4, or what I’m guessing is about 80% of the total mass in the dish.

Amount of avocado in Kraft Store-Bought “Convenient” Guacamole: 2%.

What’s the rest of what’s in that Kraft plastic bowl?

The guacamole sold by Kraft Foods Inc., one of the bestselling avocado dips in the nation, includes modified food starch, hefty amounts of coconut and soybean oils, and a dose of food coloring.

I offer this story strictly as a public service, because I don’t even like guacamole, probably because I never grew up eating avocados so never aquired a taste for the stuff. But for those who do? Sheesh. Buy the damn fruit, some garlic…oh hell, here’s what the currently-getting-screwed folks at the California Avocado Growers Association suggest:

4 ripe avocados, peeled, seeded
1 tsp ground cumin
1 ripe, medium Roma tomato, seeded, diced
½ Cup minced sweet white onion
2 serrano chilies, seeded, minced
¼ Cup chopped cilantro leaves
4 Tbsp fresh lime juice
Hot pepper sauce, sea salt, white pepper to taste

Chop and stir, or moosh together as desired for texture. Chill. Eat

There, how hard can that be? Or at least pick up some other brand than Kraft. And read the label anyway…if it says “avocado: 2%” it’s probably still Kraft just repackaged under a store-brand label. Buy elsewhere.