to show co-ordinated movement in all four extremities, maybe they'll have something.

(As a 49er fan, facing another dismal season, it just had to be said.)

Hi Sarah! (waves, slowly walks backwards reaching for the door....)

I hope you made it to the door.

Though Dallas does suck [dodges zucchini].

[ ] Very tepidly voting for Obama [ ] ?????. [ ] Any mullah-sucking billionaire-teabagging torture-loving pus-encrusted spawn of Cthulhu, bless his (R) heart.

the Niners haven't had a season since Montana's days, have they?

Actually, it's the management of the Cowboys that, not to put too fine a point on it, eats rocks and will until Jerry Jones no longer remains a part of the equation. {mutters unprintable things about over-moneyed, over-lawyered Arkansawyers meddling in what they should stay the hell out of; the treatment Jones handed Coach Landry left a big damn burr under my saddle, and the gall is still there. Moving out of Texas Stadium? WTF? he could've fixed it up for the fuel costs of the new construction, and added another ring of seats ... oh, but that isn't glam. That's maintenance. Big-time guys don't do maintenance ...}

Still...after 18 years, Tony Romo has done something I didn't think could be done. He's made me watch a Cowboys QB and think, "I like that."

Wade Phillips & Co. aren't too awful in the coaching dept., either. Something new and different happened last year: the headlines were NOT about, from one week to the next, another Dallas NFL star winding up in jail. Attitude problems R us turned into something almost like a team, with athletes on it who were, yeah, jocks, but for a change were not, you know, thugs first then jocks. I like the change; what can I say?

So yeah, you have to let me have a little room here. I liked the Oilers under Bum Phillips, and what he did with what he had to work with in New Orleans was better than it could've been (I can only imagine what he'd've achieved with a QB like Drew Brees; but the Manning boys' dad wasn't shabby, either). Lemme see if I can explain this: to me, as a kid, being a Cowboys fan wasn't so much about the team as some of the players -- Meredith, Staubach, Newhouse, Garrison, Randy White, Herschel Walker, Preston Pearson -- and some of the feats ("hail Mary" pass as an NFL term was invented in a postgame interview by Staubach).

Then along game the diamond earrings and the sheer arrogance (Troy Aikman not least of the egos in the Cowboys locker room) that went with the "new ownership."

Landry and Tex Schramm have passed away; Staubach's retiring from his (pretty well-paying) real-estate gig, and Don Meredith has a cabin in the mountains in New Mexico these days. I met Bobby Newhouse's nephew a few years ago; I don't know what happened to Walt Garrison, but Bob Lilly still looks good. His hair's snow-white, but he wears the same cut as when he anchored the Doomsday defense in the late 1970s.

Things changed -- I blame Jones. Johnson was a freakin' genius on the sidelines, but Jones couldn't stand to share the glory; so out went Johnson. Switzer, the nutcase coach who got busted in an airport with a pistol in his gym bag, didn't help. The emphasis on everything but playing a straight game and living by the outcomes without bitching -- one of the big things I liked about Landry -- was gone, baby, gone. Chan Gailey? Nice guy. Not a head coach. One of a string of about three who lasted one season with Jones. Then "Big Tuna" comes along ... and the Cowboys become the epitome of nastiness on the field as well as off.

When Parcells retires again -- except that didn't last, either, did it? -- Jones looks around for somebody to coach, and finds Bum Phillips' kid, Wade. Except Wade's no kid, now, and he brings a different attitude to the team, and lo and behold, they start not being nasty first -- they start winning ball games. And there's this dimple-faced mischief-eyed kid who runs the opposition offense in practice, and he's got a decent arm and can run when the pocket collapses.

Tony Romo makes me think I'm watching Staubach again.
Simple as that. I like him. Hence, I like the team. How long will it last? I dunno.

But I want to believe.

Oh, and Lambert? I wouldn't throw vegetables. It's a waste of food.

The rules in the NFL are different now -- I quit watching it altogether when the Oilers moved to Tennessee; Jerry Jones and Jimmy Johnson had made an Oilers fan out of me, and there is no more dismal a season prospect, year in and year out, than being a Houston NFL fan -- and I've kind of gotten a kick out of some of the changes. Two-point conversions are a lot livelier than the same old boring kick, for instance; and a challenge flag? Dude, what's up with that?

(Hence the TD Houston scored thrice last night ere the points showed up on the board.)

But ... the passion I had for sports found different outlets during my long break from the NFL. Rodeo, NASCAR, volleyball, women's college basketball -- I discovered wonderful stuff, some of which I could afford to see live.
Could being the operative word with everything but volleyball, now -- WCBB tickets were $6 a head at my alma mater when they were a winning team... oh well.

I heard a story on NPR yesterday morning hinting that major colleges are rethinking their sports schedules in light of the huge (and they claim unforseeable) rises in travel costs over the summer. I wonder if maybe, finally, sanity will return.

Naaah. This is the circuses part of our 'bread and circuses' society we're talking about, remember?

We can admit that we're killers ... but we're not going to kill today. That's all it takes! Knowing that we're not going to kill today! ~ Captain James T. Kirk, Stardate 3193.0

Sarah writes:

the Niners haven’t had a season since Montana’s days, have they?

Ouch!

No, I'm not really a fan of any of 'em right now -- the Patriots, because I liked a lot about their organization, until Belichek was revealed as a cheater.

The Raiders, back in the day. Al Davis reminded me of Hunter Thompson.

[ ] Very tepidly voting for Obama [ ] ?????. [ ] Any mullah-sucking billionaire-teabagging torture-loving pus-encrusted spawn of Cthulhu, bless his (R) heart.

Paraphrasing jihadists: "There is no Coach but Landry."

The Washington Redskins are the enemy. The Pittsburgh Steelers are the villains of any piece you care to name. The Philadelphia Eagles are perennially a dangerous foe, as are the Minnesota Vikings. The LA/Oakland Raiders are one small notch below the Steelers in bad-guy-ness.

There's a football team (sort of) in Houston, but they don't win very often. The Holy Grail is the Sixth Ring. All things good can be wrought from the shotgun on third-and-long, and the Nickel Back is the closest thing to an all-purpose defense known to humankind.

sticks head back inside door, wipes tear from eye

Our 49er glory days didn't end with Montana's departure; Steve Young did us proud in XXIX with the win, six TD passes and leading the game in rushing yards.

The big loss was Coach Walsh, who chose both Montana and Young when others had passed them by. It was his vision, his eye for talent, his ability to build a team rather than a collection of players, and most of all his astounding, unlimited capacity to teach that made the Niners a top franchise. He was also a fine, good and decent human being, much admired as a person by all who knew him and sorely missed in oh so many ways.

Dallas could do all right this year if Romo can control his happy feet, but that dancing under pressure habit is as hard to break as the yips in golf; just have to wait and see. Depending on Terrell Owens to become an adult is a risky proposition; maybe he will and the offense can prosper, but if he goes back to being Showboat McSelfish the whole team will crumble.

Still, things now are a darn sight better for them ethically than back when Michael Irvin couldn't join the huddle because the terms of his probation prohibited him from associating with know felons.

quickly withdraws head and slams door, runs cackling down the hall....

cackling over that probation business too. Things have changed a bit.

Walsh was one of the good guys.

Belichek, eh; and the signal-stealing scandal (boy didn't that die out fast; you'd think he was a Republican Senator, or something) was IMNVHO the tip of an iceberg. Belichek's not, I repeat NOT, the only coach I'd suspect of such a stunt.

Parcells? Yuk.

All that said, I'm sure it's nostalgia on my part.