Two From the Vault

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A couple of song parodies from days gone by…

This first one goes out to George: Good times back then,
eh Georgie? When you got to play Dress Up and Let’s Pretend?

PISSING IN THE WIND
(sung to the tune of Singing in the Rain)
ARTIST: Herb Brown and Arthur Freed

I’m pissing in the wind
Just pissing in the wind
What a spasmodic unveiling
I’m flapping again

I’m laughing at crowds
My ass they adore
‘Cause there’s cash in the bank
And the Press is a whore

Let the army grunts chase
Every Iraqi they face
Come on with Hussein
I’ve a bulge he can taste

I walked on the deck
With my crotch all erect
‘Cause I’m pissing
Just pissing in the wind

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This next song parody was written after the first Presidential debate between Bush and Kerry, when it appeared that Kerry had put the lie to Bush’s swagger: 43 looked angry, petulant and not presidential at all.

BUSH, THE TICKING TIME BOMB
(sung to the tune “Puff the Magic Dragon”)

Bush, the ticking time bomb, debated John Kerry
And bollocks to the whoring press who bent down on their knees
Brittle hackneyed pundits loved that strident stuff
And called him King and Fearless One and other bits of fluff, oh

Together they would battle the Truth out on the trail
Cheney kept a grip on things from his bunker deep in hell
Ignoble kings and Saudis would bow to Bush’s fame
Tyrant shits would snicker when Bush roared out wrong names, oh

(chorus)
Bush, the ticking time bomb, debated John Kerry
And bollocks to the whoring press who bent down on their knees
Bush, the ticking time bomb, debated John Kerry
And bollocks to the whoring press who bent down on their knees

A legend lives forever, but not so callow boys
Broken dreams and soldiers’ screams make for lousy toys
One strange night it happened, the Pundit Crowd played fair
And Bush the Spoiled Liar, had to face the music there

His head was bent in anger, he paced upon the stage
Bush no longer cared to hide his bitterness and rage
Without his fawning pundits, Bush could never win
So, Bush that flinty cipher found blame for everyone but him

(repeat chorus)

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Ah, memories…

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