Song In The Key Of A Well-Oiled Man

A Suit to Suit a Viper

I took a viper and I put him in a suit
I combed his hair across his head
To make him look real cute

I reminded him to keep his venom low
I taught him everything I know
Everything I know

I found a scorpion and trained him how to sit
He practiced tea and sympathy
His act was quite a hit

I took his stinger and wrapped it in a bow
I taught him everything I know
Everything I know

(chorus)
They sit angelic, composed and full of grace
They learn their lines by heart and keep a poker face
I know the world will benefit when they are truly free
To come and poison you and me
To come and posion you and me

I spied a vampire and put him to the test
Got him a lawyer and then
Sued God for damages

I told him: “be patient, blood will surely flow”
I taught him everything I know
Everything I know

I gussied up a tumor and took it to DC
And there it had a great career
It acted naturally

At the cocktail parties it always thanks the host
I taught it everything I know
Everything I know

(chorus)
They sit angelic, composed and full of grace
They learn their lines by heart and keep a poker face
I know the world will benefit when they are truly free
To come and poison you and me
To come and posion you and me

I took a viper and I put him in a suit
I combed his hair across his head
To make him look real cute

I reminded him to keep his venom low
I taught him everything I know
Everything I know

I found a scorpion and trained him how to sit
He practiced tea and sympathy
His act was quite a hit

I took his stinger and wrapped it in a bow
I taught him everything I know
Everything I know

(chorus)
They sit angelic, composed and full of grace
They learn their lines by heart and keep a poker face
I know the world will benefit when they are truly free
To come and poison you and me
To come and posion you and me

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One may smile and smile and be a villain

Hamlet
Wm. Shakespeare

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